Sunday, March 29, 2015

Squishy Vs. DOMS

O.k. This makes absolutely no sense to me. In order to build stronger muscles you must TEAR THEM APART?!? Like seriously? You work out so hard your muscles start shaking and you feel like you're going to fall over and and die and that's a good thing? Like people do this regularly? On purpose?!? Craziness!!

I had a pretty lazy Sunday, where I barely moved at all. It was fabulous. I wasn't a total slouch last weekend though. Saturday was Date Night with Ducky. 

Yes, He needs a haircut... Yes, I need a dye job...
We went to Costco, and the MOA (Mall of America for all you non-Minnesotans), and to Whole Foods (I honestly think Heaven smells like Whole Foods). We walked around a lot. I think my pedometer said like 1 million miles (more like 5 miles, but that's a lot for me). We finished the night with a romantic (well, kinda, it was dark...) dinner at Big Bowl. I had Japanese pan noodles. They were super tasty. And Dessert. We Had an amazing Dessert. I had a few bites, Ducky wanted to lick the plate. 
Mmmmm... Chocolate Lava Cake...

Anyhoo. After my lazy Sunday, I had thought I better really get a good workout in. I had made the treadmill my bitch the whole week before, and I was bored with it and thought I'd switch back to some exercise videos. So, I went to good old Daily Burn on my xbox, and to the True Beginner program (this host is the only one I've found who I don't want to punch in the face. I think it has something to do with the dimples...) I chose to do the Strength and Cardio 1 video. I had done it before, but must not have really pushed myself. This time I did. There were lunges, and squats, and jogging in place and all that jazz. By the end I was a sweaty mess and felt like I could barely stand up, but I had felt great. Until I woke up the next morning and was sore. Not too sore though. Enough where I could still function but stairs were kinda hard to do with my uber sore thighs. It got progressively worse as the day went on, and by the time I usually do my nightly workout, I was too sore to move. So, I figured I'd skip the workout and just get some sleep. Bad Idea. 

When I woke up on Wednesday, I felt like I couldn't move and just wanted to burrow my head farther into the pillows and pretend I didn't exist. Unfortunately, I'm a responsible adult and had to go to work. Every step was agony. Sitting down or getting back up made my eyes tear up. It was awful. So, a little google search later and low and behold what did I find? I had suffered from DOMS, or delayed onset muscle soreness. Apparently, after a particularly strenuous workout, your muscles literally rip apart and have to knit themselves back together, and the pain is usually worse two days after the initial workout. But, don't be dismayed because this process also is your muscles becoming stronger. I also learned that my night off made it worse, because working out actually helps ease the pain.

So, on Wednesday night, even though I felt like there were razor blades embedded in my thighs (I am prone to exaggeration) , I worked out anyway. I did a core workout that mostly involved stretching and working out my non-existent abs. And low and behold, I felt better. I woke up and Thursday morning feeling much less, but still a little, sore. And I could walk and sit down and get up without pain. 

So, what did I learn from this? To be more mindful of my body, and to push myself, but not to a crazy degree. Sure, sumo squats sound like fun, but I really shouldn't go as far down as the extremely fit host of an exercise program. 

On, the plus size ;) the plateau I had found myself in for two weeks was finally broken, and I lost 5 pounds last week. Go Squishy!

Monday, March 23, 2015

Squishy Vs. The Weekends of Doom

Being the only one in your household that's trying to eat healthier and lose weight sucks. Balls. Seriously. It seems like everywhere I turn I'm faced with delicious delicious carbs. Open the cupboard for some dill to make veggie dip when suddenly potato chips. Open the fridge to get out some veggies when suddenly glorious fatty fatty cheese. Open the freezer to get some steam-able frozen veggies when BLAM ice cream galore. It's not fair. 

The worst, however, is when I invite my nieces to spend the weekend. They are three adorable TINY blonde girls, ages 11, 7, and 3. I love them to death, and I can't say no to them, like at all. It's a serious problem. Auntie Beth can you make us cake? Why yes, of course I can! Auntie Beth can you make us rainbow sprinkle pancakes with homemade strawberry syrup and whipped cream? Why of course!! Would you like extra sprinkles on top?? Like I said, serious problem.

And it only gets worse because they want me to eat the stuff too, so I do. Because I can't say no. Lets eat popcorn while watching that movie, you have extra butter right? We cant go to the playground without stopping at taco bell for nachos and tacos first. We need to have ice cream after walking outside. We can not possibly have a fire without smores!! 

So, I overindulged and spent two weekends (because I was lucky enough to have them two weekends in a row) just forgetting I was watching what I was eating and went for it. And I loved it. I loved every second of it. You forget how all that wonderful stuff tastes while you're abstaining from it. It was really nice to not have to think about every little thing that was going into my mouth.

Then I stepped on the scale on Monday. And found out I had gained 6 pounds. In one weekend. Damn, that sucked. I worked really hard the whole week and lost 5 of them. But then the next weekend happened. And I gained 4 pounds. It took me the whole rest of the week to get back to where I was 2 weeks ago. So, a lot of hard work to basically accomplish nothing. 

But the moral of the story is, I haven't given up. I didn't say "oh, I had a good run, time to hang up my food scale and finish that chocolate cake with ice cream and sprinkles." I actually picked back up where I left off and got back on that wagon. It was a big step for me. So, now I know that I am stronger. That I can handle a setback. That I can indulge for that short amount of time and not feel like I failed. 

So, all in all The Weekends of Doom were not that at all. They were Weekends of Enlightenment. 

Monday, March 2, 2015

Squishy's Progress Report

Greetings fictional people who read my blog!

So, I thought it was about time for a progress report. And I actually have progress to report!! Go Me!!

Starting Weight: 378
Current Weight: 346

32 pounds baby! Hells Yeah Bitches!! 

Measurements: Now, I'm really putting myself out there sharing these, but since I'm feeling great about myself why not! I, unfortunately, didn't take actual beginning measurements because it took me about 3 weeks to gather the courage to actually measure myself.

Startingish Hips: 61.5
Current Hips: 59

Startingish Waist: 55
Current Waist: 51.5

I can definitely tell a difference with how my clothes fit. My pants are much looser than they were (except for my jeans which seem to lose inches with me) and I had thought that my shirts were getting shorter (turns out I was just getting wider). Also, when I look down I no longer see my pooch sticking out from underneath my boobs. And the most exciting thing? I have a butt now!! An actual discernible butt! My butt is no longer just a big lump on my back blending straight into the back of my legs. Now you can actually tell where my butt ends and the back of my thighs begin! I'm super happy to have a butt again!! It's the little things, really. 

This is a great start to my journey, and leaves me feeling uber motivated to keep going. As you can tell from reading my blog I've had many start overs and do overs and poor choices and  bad decisions. But I can feel that it's different this time. I'm in a much better place than I was before.

This time my weight loss isn't being motivated by self-hatred. This time I've decided to accept myself for the way I am NOW. I don't need to be a certain size, or look a certain way. I just want to feel better, and have the energy and ambition to do all those things I've been holding back because of my weight. I'm no longer obsessing (too much) on what I'm eating. This time if I have a piece (or whole) chocolate cake I'm not disgusted with myself and end up wanting to just quit because it's too hard. I'm not becoming upset and wanting to quit when the scale doesn't say I'm loosing as much as I wanted it to.

The best thing I've ever done is to forgive myself for all the damage that I've caused to my body, both mentally and physically. I decided that it was OK to be Me! I'm a great person! I don't have to hide behind uncomfortable layers of clothing when it's a million degrees outside. I don't have to wear pants all the time because my calfs are large and I have cankles and stretch marks. I'm beautiful the way I am now, and I'll be beautiful at whatever size or shape I will be in the future. I still have days where I doubt myself, and maybe feel like I'm not doing enough and not pushing myself enough, but that's okay. That's HUMAN. This time I realize that I can't fail unless I decide to fail. That if I give up, I decided to give up. The decision has always been mine.

The best piece of advice I've ever heard comes from my favorite person in all of pop culture: RuPaul (if you don't know who this Queen is, I suggest you do yourself a favor and educate yo'self)