Friday, May 3, 2013
Umm... Hi? It's been a while...
I'm weak. Very Very Weak. I had a really bad lapse. And I didn't blog because that would have made me accountable for all the bad things I was doing. The worse part is that I gained. A Lot. Most that I lost.
It's so easy to fall into that mindset that I don't matter. It's really easy to blame everything around me for my lapse. The truth is All I have to blame is myself. And try to get back on the wagon.
Sot that's what I'm going to do. Try.
This is going to be a long process. It's going to take Years to get to how I want to look. My problem is I want instant gratification. I want to look good now. I want to feel better now. Because food is the ultimate form of instant gratification for me. I know that if I'm sad, or stressed, or feeling bad about myself, that binging on a bunch of sugary deliciousness is going to make me feel better. At least while I'm eating it. Afterwards I'm left feeling fat and disgusting. Which makes me want to eat more. It's a horrible vicious cycle. One that I've been on most of my life.
So, I'm starting over.
My Name is Beth, and I'm addicted to food.
I weight 365 lbs, last I checked.
I'm a size 26/28.
I don't have a goal weight. Because weight doesn't matter.
I want to be a size 14.
I want to be able to shop in the Regular size section.
I want to be able to hike with my Husband and actually keep up with him and not slow him down.
I want to be able to Ride Harry Potter.
I want to feel good about myself.
Today is the day I stop making excuses and just do it.
Good Luck to me
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Hi there! I randomly came across your blog when thinking about the small ride seats on the Harry Potter ride and how they must alienate a lot of people. My heart breaks for you. I really want you to go on that ride!
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to reach out as someone who successfully lost weight on the paleo diet (some 35 lbs). I've been at my current weight since January even though I've been very lax about following it... basically I'm paleo 80% of the time. Prior to this, I'd been at the same overweight size for 12 years, thinking that it would be impossible to budge my weight since it had been so steady all that time. But paleo worked! And it's sustainable... not at the Whole30 level longterm, but at the 80% level.
I believe you can do it. If you stick to it, you can get to the point of taking that ride and wearing the Bettie Page clothes! I say this as someone who did it, and I'm no one special.
I must say that it would really help if your husband threw his support behind your efforts. Teasing you with food while you're trying to discipline yourself is *really* crappy and it absolutely affects your success. I wish he understood that. (If you're reading this, Skinny Husband, try to be supportive and eat well with her!)
Hey BETH! I've been doing Paleo for 35 days now. If I can do it you can do it. Email me at Jgossett9548@yahoo.com - Let's be friends. :)
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