The Most Humiliating Experience Ever...

I've mentioned a few times now that one of the many things I'd like to do after I've lost some (well, a lot) of weight is ride Harry Potter. For those of you that are ignorant to my meaning (assuming of course that there are actually people reading this), by riding Harry Potter, I mean attending The Wizarding World of Harry Potter at Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida and riding Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey.

I've been a huge fan of the Harry Potter series for a very long time (like almost half of my life). I started reading the books when I was in high school and I've seen every movie multiple times. When I heard that there was going to be a theme park I was so incredibly excited, and couldn't wait until I would be able to go. Well, when Tim and I decided to go on a cruise to the Bahamas, I knew this was going to be my opportunity to actually visit. 

I had reservations before going because I'm such a big girl, so I did what anybody does and researched on the internet. I read a bunch of websites saying that pretty much if you're over a size 14 and have larger than D breasts that you weren't going to fit into any of the rides in Universal Studios and that Walt Disney World was much more "fat friendly". I was kinda heart broken. I knew that I wouldn't fit so I tried to persuade my hubby to go to Disney. He didn't want to go to Disney because he had been there previously and  Disney, in his words, is junkaceous. He wanted to go to Universal Studios.

Worst Decision Ever.

There were a few rides I was able to go on. The Simpson's which is a virtual Roller Coaster, Dudley Do-Right's Ripsaw Falls (which I BARELY fit in, I mean it was a total fat girl in a little boat moment and I swear there were suctioning sounds when I literally had to pull myself out of it), Men In Black (where you just rode around trying to shoot aliens),  The Mummy (which is a total rip off of space mountain... and I again BARELY fit), and Jurassic Park (which was just okay). There was a lot of walking around and waiting for Tim when he went on all the cool roller coasters, some of them multiple times. I totally felt left out and was pretty miserable but tried my best to put on a Happy Face for him so he had enough fun for the both of us.

So, now we come to the MOST humiliating experience ever. Harry Potter and the Forbidding Fat People From Riding the Forbidden Journey.

The Wizarding World of Harry Potter is amazing visually. The whole atmosphere is just like in the movies, and walking into the area you can see Hogwarts looming over everything. There's the Hogwarts Express, and Hogsmeade, and carts selling Butterbeer (which is totally tasty) and Pumpkin Juice, and Honey Dukes, and other amazingness. If not for the whole unbearable heat thing I could have sworn I was in England.  I mean, totally cool. 

Test Seats for the Forbidden Journey

But, the rides are meant for skinny people and children. During my research I learned that there are test seats available for every ride and you are encouraged to use them. First of all, those test seats are a magnet for children to play with. You have to walk into a big group of people to get to them, and then you have to either ask the young children to get off or witness their parents yanking them off of them so the fat person can try them out. I know you will never see these people again, but that doesn't make the Looks hurt any less. In order for you to be able to ride, you need a green light. I couldn't even light up the red light.  They even have Fat Police stationed near the beginning of the rides to encourage larger people to try them out. 

The lady who picked me out of the crowd was pretty nice, and said that I wouldn't be able to ride the ride but I was welcome to go view the castle. Well, the first time we were by there I was so devastated that I just told Tim to ride it and I went and cried in a corner (literally). He said it was pretty cool and that really made me feel worse ( I was hoping maybe it was super cheesy or something). I was actually able to fit into the Flight of the Hippogriff (the little kid ride) and that was pretty cheesy. 

We had 2 day passes and the next day after riding some of the other rides  Tim convinced me to tour the castle. We start walking up and I'm picked out by another Fat Police person, and I told them I knew already I was too fat and I just wanted to tour the castle. The castle was pretty awesome and I would have enjoyed myself if I hadn't been stopped by 5 other fat police, each urging me to try the test seats. I had to say repeatedly "Yes, I know I'm too FAT to fit into the seats! I'm just touring the castle!" Seriously, by the end I just felt so horrible about myself that I wasn't even able to enjoy it. And having to exit the ride in front of all those people getting on the ride is just totally humiliating. I just wanted to leave and eat myself to death (which I realize is counter productive). I'm sure all this is a lot worse in my head, but it's my head and I can feel the way I want.

So, back to my goal. Once I reach my One Hot Mama Status I'm going to make myself a t-shirt that says "I lost 200lbs Just So I Can Ride Harry Potter". And I will ride it 10 times in a row until I'm sick of it. 

And before I leave I'll have some Butterbeer. With the whipped cream. And enjoy Every Single Sip.